so like totally totally random today… it hits me… FUCK i am going to be moving out in like 5 fucking months time. i am like what the fuck.! seems like just yesturday that i was finishing primary school, scared as fuck about going to intermediate.. and here i am…. a soon to be  ”adult”. and you know what? i am scared as fuck. but damn excited at the same time. no more listning to the family yelling at me to go study, no more readily cooked meals when i am hungry. no more mommys soup when i am sick in bed, no more jumping out my window in the middle of the night.  I am guna be free… however… freedom comes with responsibility… can i handle it!! i belive so.. :S  it didnt occur to me that i would grow up so damn fast. the last 5 years have gone by so fast. i dont even believe it. and the shit i have been though. the high school experiences that i can never experience again. the changes i have gone through. i mean i was a -never had alcohol, never been to a party, never had a boyfriend, never had a cellphone, never wagged a single classed virgin- hell. the innocent retard i was. yet i miss those days like fuck. i mean a good night for me would be sitting at a mates pad in the school holidays playing the sims and eating corn chips. Haha. that was the highlight of my year. so Question!

where the fuck am i going end of this year? what the fuck am i going to do? what the fuck am i going to study. am i going overseas? staying in this shithole? going up to akl? heading back down to cold as fuck Christchurch? or going somewhere completely foriegn and make totally new friends.

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. my future is a complete mystery.. i am thiiinking.. of doing law & phycology at either waikato or CHCH or totally bumming out and do phyc and management. or possibly going to cop collage?! i wanna be a cop!!! fuck. who knows. but you know what i am keen for? the fucking pissups i am going to have next year! shit legally be able to drink and fuck around in town. be trouble, thats what ima be next year. hahhahahha. nah ima be a fucking nerd and study.

wow so many posibilities and suprisingly such little time. member in 4th form, started stressing, coz i had no idea what i wanted to do for the rest of my life. and teachers telling me that im only 14 give it a break. and told me to start worrying in 7th form…. SHIT. yes i am stressed like a bitch. yet here i am. procrasinating when i have another 3 damn exams this week. L O L much.

 

Shit happends.

Life goes on.

I will get the fuck over it. =)

 

till my next rant. ciao. xo.

-Bee.